By: Mary Fran Bontempo

rear view of a girl pointing remote to a televisionI don’t watch a lot of television, except for Say Yes to the Dress, which I binge watch every chance I get. (I cannot get enough of wedding gowns.) But as with everything, I have serious opinions about what I do watch.

And right now, Marty McFly’s mother is making me uncomfortable.

Actress Lea Thompson played the mother to Michael J. Fox’s Marty in the 1985 film Back to the Future, where she missed dancing at the high school prom, instead finding herself stuck in a car with the school lunkhead. She’s trying to make up for it now by cutting a rug on this season’s Dancing With the Stars.

I’d rather see her in the car with Biff.

Though she’s consistently placed high in scores, for some reason, I find her painful to watch. Not as painful as awkward NASCAR racer Michael Waltrip (how is he still on the show?), but still painful. And not nearly as annoying as Carrie Ann Inaba and Bruno Tonioli. Can someone shut those two up, please? Also, as much as I love to watch Alfonso Ribeiro, I’ve heard him say the word “groin” just a few too many times tonight.

Leah Remini took over hosting duties for Erin Andrews, grating like a sharp hunk of parmigiano, while Tommy Chong stumbled through another routine, looking like he just emerged from his zillionth pot-induced haze.

The male dancers have decided that shirts are unnecessary, as, apparently, is body hair. Good thing they tape the show in California. Anywhere else and the men would freeze to death.

Then of course, there are the commercials for erectile dysfunction. Viagra and Dancing With the Stars. Pandering to the audience?

Oh, and let’s not forget the political ads. Because we haven’t had enough name calling and backstabbing from those pantheons of virtue we’re electing to office.

Okay, I’m done for now. It’s after eleven and bedtime. Maybe I’ll be in a better mood tomorrow. Or maybe I’ll just leave the TV off.